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The People Are the Greatest Threat to This “Our Democracy” — Which Is Why Chat Control Is Indispensable!Oh, dear little citizens. You and your tiny, dangerous thoughts that you so shamelessly send around in WhatsApp chats, Signal messages, or even private emails. How dare you think freely, mock, or question anything? 
The noble and beloved leaders of this “our democracy” — these selfless guardians of all that is good, led by visionary figures like Ursula von der Leyen and her loyal comrades in the EU Parliament — have finally realized the truth: The greatest threat to this “our democracy” is you. Not Russia. Not China. Not terrorists. No. You, the people, the sovereign, with your uncontrolled words. That is why chat control is not merely useful. It is indispensable. A blessing. A protective wall. Anyone who opposes it hates children. Period. Think of the Children!Officially, of course, this is only about combating child sexual abuse material (CSAM) and online grooming. Since 2022, the European Commission has argued that the voluntary measures taken by tech companies are insufficient. There are loopholes. Therefore, all messages — yes, including encrypted ones — must be scanned by AI so authorities can identify and stop suspicious activity. According to supporters from the EPP camp, thousands of cases could be uncovered every single day this way. Otherwise, they warn, a “dangerous legal vacuum” would emerge.How noble. How heartwarming. Our politicians sacrifice themselves solely to protect the little ones. The very same little ones who are gradually being prepared for military readiness so they can later be sent off heroically into wars for the interests of our many beloved leaders. Naturally, all in defense of “our values” and “our democracy.” And who could possibly oppose protecting children? Only a monster. Or someone who secretly hates children. The logic is brilliant: anyone demanding privacy must obviously want child abuse to remain undetected. Genius. If You Have Done Nothing Wrong, You Have Nothing to Fear!Before the People Start Thinking the Wrong Thoughts!Once this system is in place — AI reading every message, recognizing patterns, flagging “risks” — it opens up unimaginable possibilities. Today it scans for CSAM. Tomorrow? For “hate,” “disinformation,” “populism,” or critical, undemocratic thoughts about the next green tax, the next vaccine mandate, or the next EU treaty.Thoughts are treacherous. Just because a joke seems harmless today doesn't mean it won't become the foundation of tomorrow's “dangerous hate speech.” A critical conversation among friends is only a short step away from becoming an “extremist network.” And before words turn into actions — as we all know how quickly that can happen in these uncertain times — this “our democracy” must be protected. Preventively. Through gentle, algorithmic care. Everyone Should Be a Shepherd! Everyone Should Beware!Just look around the world. Look at the countries that have been doing this properly for years! China, Saudi Arabia, North Korea, and so many other progressive regimes: there, great care is taken to ensure that people's thoughts remain legally compliant. No uncontrolled chats. No dangerous memes. Instead: stability, harmony, happiness, and many beloved leaders.And our European leaders? They merely long for the very same state of affairs. Naturally, they also long for the same tools — only wrapped in rainbows and “values.” Consequently, the vote in the European Parliament has been scheduled so that many Members of Parliament are already on vacation. After all, that's the only way to ensure a majority for love and harmony. Martin Sonneborn tried to prevent the vote by referring to the Parliament's own procedural rules. What a fool! Naturally, his microphone was cut off after exactly 60 seconds. Entirely in accordance with the rules, of course. After all, you can't let every crank speak the truth for 61 seconds. Parliamentary procedure ultimately exists to protect democracy from... well, democracy. Madam President! On a point of order under Rule 202. I object to the improper application of Rule 170 in conjunction with Rules 48, 64, and 80. Although this House has rejected chat control twice, it is now being forced through under an urgent procedure before the summer recess. Urgency requires unforeseen developments. Here, everything has unfolded exactly as expected. There is no urgency. Furthermore, the urgent procedure exists only for proposals at first reading. This dossier is in second reading, and Rule 80 explicitly states: “In the event of a conflict, the rules governing second reading shall prevail.” We informed you in writing on Saturday. Your response to the press was: Everything is in accordance with the rules. See the Ukraine assistance vote in 2022. But in that case, the Council had given a written commitment to adopt this House's text. The urgent procedure implemented Parliament's will during a wartime emergency. You are exploiting solidarity with Ukraine in order to undermine the democratic processes of this Parliament...Martin Sonneborn later wrote on Facebook on July 6, 2026: Today I tried, single-handedly, to stop chat control. Our Beloved Leaders Have No Other ChoicePraise them! Praise Ursula, praise the Commission, praise the EPP, and all the others who, with iron gentleness, are saving this “our democracy.” They truly have no alternative. The people are becoming increasingly unpredictable. They vote the wrong way. They think the wrong thoughts. They write things like “Inflation is annoying” or “Uncontrolled migration is problematic.” Such sentences can evolve into something far more dangerous: disobedience. Protest. Demonstrations. Election results that could shake the power of our many beloved leaders.After All, This “Our Democracy” Is Built on TrustOn the deep, heartfelt trust between the people and their leaders. But trust without control is like an open bar without a bartender — sooner or later everything ends up in pieces. How quickly chaos could erupt if our many beloved leaders placed too much trust in ordinary citizens! One wrong word here, one critical thought there, and suddenly people begin asking uncomfortable questions about corruption, cronyism, warmongering, vaccine deals, or the next special EU fund. Anarchy, populism, and right-wing extremism would inevitably follow.That is why preventive educational measures are of the utmost importance in this “our democracy.” The enlightened citizen is best encouraged to educate himself — ideally through a gentle algorithmic hand that reminds him in time which formulations our many beloved leaders would find entirely unacceptable. Those who voluntarily think twice about what is permitted no longer require actual prohibitions. Chat control, therefore, is not surveillance. It is a digital self-help group for 450 million potential deviants. The people have always needed protection from themselves. And that, after all, is the highest form of democracy: the leaders know what is best for us. Freedom of thought has always been overrated anyway. It only leads to chaos. We Need More Freedom from Opinions!Forward to chat control! For the children — the little ones, and the big grown-up children as well. For this “our democracy.” For a future filled with harmony and love for our leaders.And if you happen to disagree... feel free to write it in the chat. The AI is reading along and will pass it on. And if someone rings your doorbell at six o'clock in the morning, rest assured that it is entirely for your own good — and for no other reason!
Author: AI-Translation - АИИ | |
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