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Strength Through Joy of the Beloved Leader: Politics Ensures the Health of the PeopleThere is fantastic news to report again. Thanks to the beloved leaders in Berlin and Brussels, but also in Washington, the German people will become significantly healthier in the near future. 
Political decisions regarding wars and rising energy costs will have an excellent effect. We, the subjects, the people, will become considerably fitter and healthier in the coming months and years. The evil Russian has reported that the beloved and non-democratically elected EU Commission President Ursula von der Leyen also rules out buying Russian gas even in the event of power outages. We can truly consider ourselves fortunate to have such a glorious leader at the helm of the EU, who always has the best interests of the people at heart. Fuel prices are already climbing above 3 euros per liter. Driving a car is finally becoming what the beloved Greens have long wanted it to be: a luxury. And this is exactly where the improvement of public health comes in. Your commute is 3, 4, 5 kilometers long. Excellent! Walk it. With brisk steps, you can even cover 6 kilometers per hour. You just need to get up a little earlier. Your commute is 50 kilometers long? That’s no problem either. You can easily manage it by bicycle in 2 hours. Along the way, you can listen to podcasts or the latest fantastic political news about new promises that will make all our lives better. If you have an office job, you can already make the first phone calls on the way. Isn’t that an improvement in efficiency? And you, who enjoy an electric car: this will not leave you unscathed. Power outages will affect you too. In some countries, energy is already being rationed. This will also happen in Germany – as the beloved Ursula already predicts. Your solar power will no longer charge your car battery – it has to go into the grid to somehow keep the country running. Your electricity belongs to the people – for solidarity and all that. And if there isn’t enough electricity to charge your car battery, your wallbox will be deactivated. Then you’ll walk or ride your bicycle. It will be simply wonderful. And no, you citizens receiving basic income and couch potatoes, you will of course not be left unhealthy either. As energy prices rise, so do supermarket prices. It is already predicted that due to the illegal war of aggression by the USA and Israel against Iran, there will be disruptions in fertilizer supply. Fertilizer will therefore not only become more expensive but may also be insufficient to properly fertilize crops. As a result, plants grow less well, yields decrease. So calorie saving and calorie reduction will be on the agenda for you too. But that’s good because some studies suggest that people without extra fat on their bodies live longer. Provided, of course, they are not struck by an illness for which the body has insufficient reserves. And here we come to the supply of medicines: shortages may also occur. So head to the herbalist, into the forests and fields, to reconnect with what used to naturally alleviate the occasional ailment. Back to nature, away from chemistry, purely plant-based. It is truly heartwarming to see how farsighted the beloved leaders act. They have the future of us all in mind. They know what is important and right for the subjects, the people, the sovereign. We should hold demonstrations – in front of town halls, district offices, state parliaments, and the Bundestag – to honor the beloved leaders and their divine foresight. We should consider what we, the loyal subjects, could do to further improve the health of our people, right? What could we do to please the beloved leaders even more? How about a digital ID linked to the digital euro account? That way, it can already be checked in supermarkets that you are not buying beyond your calorie needs. How about mandatory smartphones and apps? This way, numerous data points can be collected and analyzed: daily steps, how much CO₂ has been saved. This can be centrally evaluated, and on large displays and in apps we can see every day who, through their behavior, pleases the beloved leaders the most. How about more artificial intelligence in all our lives? If AI decides in advance what we should do, it saves the body’s energy and relieves us of the unbearable burden of having to think for ourselves. I believe there are countless ways we could support the beloved leaders. Simply wonderful, isn’t it? In any case, we will become fitter, slimmer, and much closer to the ideal measurements of many influencers. Author: AI-Translation - Maximus Polemikus | |
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