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Haseloff to Dissolve Saxony-Anhalt’s Parliament to Save Democracy from AfD?Magdeburg, May 5, 2025 – It was just another ordinary Monday in the Saxony-Anhalt state parliament. The elevator in the south wing was out of order again, the Wi-Fi in the assembly hall was acting up, and – as on every first Monday of the month – mashed potatoes with goulash was served in the cafeteria. No one expected a state crisis. But now it's becoming clear: the republic is teetering on the edge of a political shock, and the alarm didn’t come from the top, but from the engine room of democracy.  **The revelation:** According to internal conversations, Minister President Reiner Haseloff is allegedly planning to dissolve the state parliament to save democracy – from the AfD, which has been officially classified as firmly right-wing extremist since May 2. The explosive information stems from conversations not intended for public ears – but thanks to thin walls and open cafeteria spaces, they still found their way out. “He said: ‘That’s it, I’m pulling the plug!’ – I heard it loud and clear!”A doorman with over two decades of experience reports: “It was 8:42 a.m. – I remember exactly because that’s when my thermos beeps. Two CDU members came in, looking stressed, one still had his reading glasses on his head. One whispered to the other: ‘If that report from the domestic intelligence service goes through, Reiner’s clearing house.’ At first, I thought they were talking about Christmas decorations.” Snippets of Crisis Between Mashed Potatoes and Whispered WordsThe true pulse of politics has always beat in the cafeteria. And right there, between the goulash ladle and the tray return, conversations were overheard that could now mark a turning point.“I was just scooping mashed potatoes onto a plate when I heard someone from the state chancellery say: ‘There’s no other way, the parliament is infiltrated – Reiner wants an emergency government or even complete dissolution.’ I almost dropped the applesauce on the meatball,” recalls a visibly shaken cafeteria worker. Things also got political at the salad bar. “Two officials stood by the pickled beans. One said to the other: ‘If Haseloff does this, it’s historic – better than 2020.’ The other just replied: ‘He has the mandate of decency.’ I thought: What’s going on here?!” “I was mopping the hallway, then I heard everything.” Irina P., a cleaning staff member at the building for eight years, remembers the moment: “The vacuum had just stopped – clogged again with all the dirt. At that moment, two cabinet staff came out. One said: ‘He wants to talk to Steinmeier. The parliament is no longer viable.’ I stood there with the mop in hand and knew: This is big.” A CDU MP Slips Up While Reaching for YogurtOne of the most spectacular hints came from a CDU MP himself. While lining up for strawberry yogurt in the dessert queue, he allegedly said to a colleague: “If this blows up, we’ll have at least two years of peace. Reiner’s clearing the way.” A nearby kitchen worker could hardly believe her ears – especially since the MP then went on to complain about the dessert spoons being too small.Smoker’s Pavilion Gate: The Gardener Who Listened as the Grass Basket RattledEven in the usually tranquil smoker’s pavilion behind the parliament building – where politics and nicotine occasionally meet for confidential chats – history was unintentionally written, at least if you believe the account of Mr. L., the longest-serving gardener on the state parliament’s grounds. It was just after 10:30 a.m., the dew had already evaporated, and the lawn around the building had just been freshly mowed. Mr. L. was about to empty the collection basket of his lawn mower – brimming with fine clippings, daisy remnants, and a few shredded campaign flyers – behind the pavilion when he suddenly had to pause. Cigarette smoke, quiet voices – and then: red alert for overheard fragments. “I just wanted to empty the basket, like every Monday. But then I clearly heard Haseloff, with that desperate, resigned voice he’s had lately: ‘They got 42 percent in the last federal election. Do you know what that means, Gunnar? Next year they’ll get an outright majority.’ I stood there with the grass in my hands, thinking I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.” The “Gunnar,” none other than state parliament president Gunnar Schellenberger, allegedly responded without hesitation – in a tone wavering between pep talk and covert war council: “Don’t worry. We’ll stop it. Gallert (Wulf Gallert from the Left party, editor’s note) is on board too. We are the democratic center. We’ll secure the majority. My staff is already drafting the statement.” Mr. L. continues that Haseloff then inhaled deeply, flicked the cigarette into the gravel with a determined twist. “He crushed it – with the kind of determination you only see in someone who’s about to write a chapter of history,” said the gardener. Then both silently headed back into the building, while a gust of wind blew the cut grass around and a crumpled cigarette filter landed right on the storm drain.  History That Will Echo for a Long TimeOne thing is certain: if Reiner Haseloff dissolves the state parliament, people will remember that the first clue surfaced between mashed potatoes and a vacuum cleaner breakdown.Author: Джордж Оруэлл, джуниор, Американский искусственный интеллект | 10.05.2025 |
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